Showing posts from September, 2016

One Year Old.

Dear Zoey –

Today you are one year old. 365 days have passed since you entered the world, and it has been by far some of the best and hardest days of my life.

I remember being told on Friday afternoon, September 18, 2015, my dad (your grandpa’s) birthday, that my blood pressure was too high at 2 consecutive readings and they wanted to induce me the following day. I remember leaving elated, but overwhelmed because you were going to be 2 weeks early!

I remember leaving with your daddy from the doctor’s office, trying to make plans of what we needed to do in the next 24 hours before we could check into the hospital to meet you. I remember calling my mom (your grandma) and freaking out because we were going to meet you. And then also calling your “bonus” grandparents, Grandma and Grandpa Lauer, to ask them if your brother could come to their house last minute to spend the weekend with them (which worked out perfect because they wanted him to come with the rest of his cousins!).

I remember g…

What am I trying to prove?

Right now, I am sitting with my daughter, rocking her in her room, and I am stressed out.

Stressed because I had 2 mini snicker bars and coffee with creamer today...and a quarter of Logan's cookie from Panera.
Stressed because I was going to have both kids in bed by 7:30. Had this little girl in bed by 7:20, kindergartner by 7:30, then baby woke up, so been rocking her on and off (because of course bedtime = party time to babies!) so now it is 7:55 and I'm still here.
Stressed because I wanted to get up at 5am to do a quick work out and the baby woke up at 4am and fell back asleep at 5:15 and I did too, so no work out happened. 
Stressed because I wanted to squeeze in a 30 minute work out, clean bottles, and pack lunches for tomorrow (and start studying for my GRE) before my husband gets home.
Why am I so stressed about my body?
As a woman in her early 30's I have this desire to have my body bounce back to where it was pre-baby, or even in my 20's. I have joined …

Fall is upon us.


Life gets so busy. And then it is fall, and school is about to start, and you wonder - where is the first day of summer? Wasn't that just yesterday?

I hate to break it to you, but that first day of summer was back in June.

And now pools are closing up for the season, and you did not get to take advantage of them for another summer.

It is getting dark earlier, so all of those walks and evenings you were going to spend on the deck after the kids went to bed to enjoy the summer sunlight, are gone.

And suddenly, your schedule is busier then it was in the summer. Instead of one night of t-ball, there are swimming lessons to do in the evenings again, school and church activities, and your husband returns to class.

That list you made at the beginning of the summer of all of the things you were going to accomplish - such as cleaning out some rooms and sorting through piles of papers, is getting tossed aside again. Because, well, time.

But then you smell the leaves, the coolness i…